Clue #1, My Bio

When I was 28, I wrote the following as my bio for 28 and Over:

Unemployment gives you a lot of time--sometimes a little too much. Cut me some slack! I actively look for a job, I'm a hobby photographer in hopes of making it a non-conventional living, and I'm in the military reserves. I probably don't have it as bad as others, but this blog will probably convince you how lonely jobless can be.

I was unemployed at the time--not very surprising. I've bounced from job to job, and I really don't even remember all of them, but I also wasn't the type of person to lose a job within a week. The stress of unemployment did, in fact, affect me. All those movements to different firms did cause me to be anxious that I'd lose my job, and I became really afraid that I would be criticized by people. I became good at justifying mistakes, saying things like, "nobody would notice," or, "I deserve to _______." I was also good at distancing myself from the criticism of millennials that we are lazy and entitled. Come to think of it, there were many times within the last five years that I WAS entitled. 

"Cut me some slack!", I write in my bio with the angst of somebody who's only yet lived up to 28. 

I was very much into photography then, but I did not possess the right mind set that the art required. (Spoiler alert: I still don't). I had this arrogance that I was creative enough and I'd figure it out as I go because I will also be lucky enough to just hit the jackpot and be good at what I do. I secretly thought that I was fucking brilliant and that I will be the best in my field. The goal was clear, I knew there was a path to it, but I didn't exactly have a picture of what the path to that looks like. I anticipated that it's a lot shorter. Boy was I wrong. Most likely still am.

"I probably don't have it as bad as others..." well at least of THAT I'm fucking aware of.

Also, the term you needed was "joblessness", you arrogant little prick. LOL

Joblessness is indeed lonely. But loneliness is also pretty damn lonely.

Lonely.

Currently still here, 5 years later.

Yikes.

I first created this blog when I was 28, hence, why it's called 28 and Over.

I told myself then that I would create a blog about how "over" I am at life already, in a sort of "take me out back and shoot me Old Yeller style," but also not to be taken too seriously kind of way.

Fast-forward into the future and I'm actually 33 now.

Snerk.

It's been five years of a sustained helldom. What the fuck happened?

The only thing left to do is re-explore those last five years and piece together why I've become more depressed, more anxious, slightly making more money, and still a fucking slut.

I should probably change that photo, too.